Tuesday, 9 December 2008

I can see pain

I can see peoples pain. It hurts to look at it. The other day was having a barbeque with a group of people and they were talking about schooldays and one said to everyone in general but I suspect to his father that he wouldnt dare do anything wrong because hed be beaten by his grandfather if he did. I heard that, and I am sure everyone heard that, but in typical human style is was ignored. I wanted to say, I know the pain you feel! I know what its like to be unherad and dismissed!! But i too, pretended I didnt hear it :( I see peoples pain everywhere. People crying out for peple to care but the signals going missed and the bubbles brekaing and the hurt in their eyes. I wish i couldnt see all that, because I feel it too, and carry it with me, and I cant do a thing about it.

Im so fricking hormonally on edge right now. Upset by everything and jealous about all. Its like watching a car crash. cant stop it but can see it happening in front of me. Hate PMS. Sooo tired too this month.

Ventured out with a couple of Lukes female friends yesterday. Going to the beach with 20 year olds made me very nervous, but I was relieved to find my body shaped up to it, and was comparably ok next to the 20 year olds, so wasnt too embarassed at all. In fact had quite a nice time, nice to hang out with girls again. I do find I miss Mie.


Michael said...

Hi Angel,

Maybe you have the sixth sense (except that you're not dead and don't see dead people). I have no idea what I'm talking about.

Jealous of you going to the beach. We have a lot of snow here. No fun. My seasonal affectiveness disorder must be kicking in. :(

I hope you're feeling better.

Harrier said...

Hi Angel,

Sorry I haven't been around, but with the death of my mum last month & my wife in hospital until the end of this month things have not been good for me.

Sounds like things are panning out quite well for you since I last looked on here, and I'm pleased for you over your thoughts about Luke. As for pretending you don't hear things that others say, sometimes it is what they want even though they say them out loud. It isn't bad to let them pass, but I'm sure you have the wisdom to know when & when not to say something.

Just a thought, but have you tried taking Evening Primrose Oil or Starflower Oil capsules, these will help, and I can vouch for that as my wife used to before she had a hysterectomy and my son's girlfriend takes them now and she swears by them during PMS & her period.

If you looked like me, old/fat/bald & ugly then I would say don't bother going to the beach at all, but with your looks and body I wouldn't worry about going to the beach with anyone no matter what age they are, you look fantastic.

Anyway, enough said for now, I'm off back to the hospital to see my wife so will catch up with you soon.

Steve x x x

Angel said...

Steve, so sorry to hear about the passing of your mother,its a horrid thing to go throuh, but christmas time makes it a littlee worse. My thoughts are with you Sorry also to hear of your wifes illness, I do hope its nothing too serious... have tried eve primrose, but cant really digest pills because of the celiac disease. Also they had me taking 50 a day to get any benefit and it still didnt work :(

Take care, and I hope all goes well for you and yours.

Angel x

Anonymous said...

hi---where you been? no new posts?