Ive decided. Being alone in a country you call home is much worse than being alone in a foreign country. Im scared and panicked and alone. I have no one to help, or rely on or even talk to. Now yes this is partly because of the reclusive person I am, and partly because of the bad decisions I made when falling in love with Christian. I really believed I was meant to be with him, however harshly he treated me, however many promises he broke. I loved him.
Its times like this I wish I had parents, or a family to at least talk to, if not to give me advice, guidance and support. But I dont. So I just have to get the hell on with it.