Friday, 17 August 2007

Esteem issues

I have incredibly low self esteem- especially premenstrually. I wasn't born this way. As a baby I'd cry and expect to be fed, but somewhere along the way it got battered out of me. But how do you get high esteem? I always think other people are better than me. I get jealous when boyfriends talk to other women, or when other women flirt with my boyfriends.

The thing is - I see them as a better option than me- I am short and plain and have curly brown hair. They are tall and blond and have long brown legs and wear short skirts to show them. How can I compete with that! More importantly- how do I stop thinking like that?! How do I stop thinking that at the first opportunity a guy is going to run off with another woman ?(It's happened before).

When I was career girl back in England, the management always used to send me on confidence courses. It's not that I don't have confidence- I have a quiet confidence. But I see myself as this small person who everyone else is better than. My parents made me this way- no doubt. But how to fight it. Better still- how to change it?

1 comment:

Thomas Ebdrup said...

You self esteem will come when you love yourself.
You are a lovely girl who sould absolutely love herself. You have a lot to offer when you are willing to. You are far from plain and simple. You are highly complex and need a lot of attention.
Hope you have found the one who can give you all you need.