PMDD

Those of you who know me, or follow my blog may realise a pattern in the way I feel. I thought it was PMS, but looing into it it is actually PMDD ... http://www.bcwomens.ca/Services/HealthServices/ReproductiveMentalHealth/MentalHealth/PMSPMDD.htm

So I need to follow the advice although I think it is pretty severe, I do get very distressed some months. My bloody brain is fucked up, chemically speaking.

But right now I am no longer premenstrual so everything is fine again. But I know in two or three weeks I will probably get depressed if not crazy.

So I'm off to singapore on tuesday and after that probably Bali before meeting up with Jackson again in the phillipines (if the country is travelable)

I like it when my brain is calm and able to think clearly and make decisions like now. I can't handle it when it zooms off into space and makes me sad and angry and upset. And neither do the people around me, which makes me more upset.

I don't think another person can cope with the way I get, so thinking I will be alone a long time, will of course do my best to keep it under control but its so hard.